By Alex Watt for Redbook©
© broadcastertr – Getty Images
If you’re being honest, lying is probably a big part of your daily life. Even if you’re not running a pyramid scheme or cheating on your partner, little “white lies” or “untruths” likely fly out of your mouth as regularly as planes do at JFK Airport. Sometimes it’s out of kindness, sometimes it’s out of convenience—but either way, it’s a lie. And that’s the truth.
“I’ll be there in 5 minutes.”
When you’re running late, “5 minutes” can really mean anything from 10 to 20 minutes. So if someone tells you they’re “20 minutes late,” you might as well get comfortable.
“We need to catch up!”
Making polite conversation when you run into a coworker can often make you want to run in the other direction — yet for some reason we feel obligated to make plans for a more in-depth catch-up before scurrying off. It’s not real unless someone sends a calendar invite, and chances are, neither one of you is going to follow through.
“That name sounds familiar.”
No, the name of your co-worker’s boyfriend’s former college roommate probably doesn’t sound familiar, but but it still feels good to seem so well-connected.
“I didn’t get your text.”
Blaming a failure in technology is one of the oldest tricks in the book. You got the text, the text simply didn’t get your attention.
“I was going to say that!”
No, you weren’t going to say the clever thing you just heard someone say. You just wish you had.
“I’m humbled…”
If you’re so humbled by whatever award or accolade you just received, why do you keep talking about it? Humble people don’t brag, they let their accomplishment speak for itself…and befriend people who will tell everyone so they don’t have to.
“I’m too tired.”
On the surface, this is true—we’re all tired. It’s a lie, however, when you say you’re too exhausted to go to the movies with a friend, but stay up until 3am watching videos on the internet.
“I didn’t mean to!”
Everyone has done something wrong and then blamed it on an accident. Maybe try a different excuse next time you spend 20 minutes guessing your significant others’ passcode, scrolling through their photo library, and sending yourself every suspicious photo they’ve ever taken.
“I’ll do it later.”
Yeah, maybe you will do it later, but probably even later than the late you initially imagined. Stop using vague language to shield your laziness. You’re not fooling anyone.
“This is delicious.”
When tasting someone’s cooking, always go with a polite reaction — even if it’s a bit of a fib.
“It was here a second ago…”
If it was there a second ago, the search would be over. It’s more likely that it was there two days ago and has since been moved — or you’re just plain forgetful.
“This is the best gift ever!”
A sweater that isn’t your style, doesn’t fit, and is so coarse even the moths don’t want anything to do with it is “the best gift ever”? It must be one of those Christmas miracles you hear about.
“I was only kidding”
Put your foot in your mouth, and now you’re trying to back-pedal? Chalking the blunder up to a joke is one way to do it…though it’s not very convincing.
“I’m busy that weekend”
It’s a lot easier to make plans up than it is to actually make and keep real ones. Especially when you really, really, really don’t want to.
“I’ll just have one.”
Lying to yourself might not seem that bad, but it also impacts the people who invite you to try their nachos.
